Hello sweet peas,
Okay, we have all had our messy nights out so can relate to the morning after. Whether you find yourself in someone else’s bed, outside in an alleyway or locked outside your bedroom on the floor, the morning after is interesting to say the least. I’ve put together a recollection of all the stories of nights out from my friends and myself to give you a image of what the morning is like.
After a night out when you’ve had a little too much to drink and you wake up in a daze, panic kicks in.
First of all you wonder what is the time? Is it still night or is it the next morning? Did I even close my curtains?Then you think okay well where is my phone? Phew found my phone in a shoe and it’s 9am, I’ve made it to morning. No cracks or damage to the phone, good one.
Then you begin snuggle back into bed but can’t remember coming home, so next panic is where is your purse? Okay found it under your bed or on the floor where you have obviously dropped it. Next check for any money left (hopefully), debit card, ID and for me, student card. Wow you were successful at looking after your belongings, it is already looking good. Although there have been occasions where you’ve lost your debit card, so now you’re on the phone to your bank cancelling that probably still drunk. Oh, that is what you was crying about last night… What a nightmare.
Further panic as you begin to check all social media, and I’m talking Facebook and messenger, Twitter, Snapchat, Instagram and anywhere else that you could have embarassed yourself online. You really don’t want to be that person with a 100 second snapchat story, do you?
Okay now checking texts: did you really send your dad ‘UUUR TH BEST LUV U CXX’? at 2:36am? That’s kinda funny. Drunk texting can be either really funny for the recipient or just awkward especially if it is to an ex boyfriend/girlfriend or to your piano teacher. It should be a rule that phones are disabled once under the influence of alcohol, purely for the sake of the drunk mess
Now you should really try and piece your night back together. So we started here at pre drinks then got the bus into town and to the club. The bus driver didn’t let your friend on because he was throwing up, but that didn’t stop you. Right you remember being in town because another friend nearly fell in the river but where did we go after that? Did we even go to that club, I don’t remember? Actually yes we did because I made friends with the bouncers.. Okay so we went to that club, oh dear bad choice. I remember dancing, a lot. Oh yes and ordering 6 jäger bombs, no wonder I have no money left. But after that it’s becoming blurry. Hmm, I remember leaving the club maybe, what time was that? Actually I don’t.. Hmm I think I looked after a crying girl in the toilets, I don’t know why she was crying, who she was or what I said but in times of drinks needs, I was there for her. Tequila ah yes my friend. So many shots of tequila, arriba! Right, so what happened after, I’m confused.
Flicking through photos on your phone enlightens us all about your big night out. The shame of taking 50+ photos including selfies with the cheesy chip man, of your friend on the loo and other blurry evidence of your night is alway helpful and can be very funny. You’re surprised that you didn’t lose your phone the amount of times you had it out, it’s all good. Speaking of photos, in a daze you fall out of bed and towards your laptop logging on to find whether or not the camera man in the club pap’d you dancing. Oh dear oh dear, they have not caught you at your finest moment. The shame, the humiliation and also who are all the people you’re with? They are definitely not your friends, did you even come home with them?
The hangover is kicking in now whilst you lay in bed texting your friends ‘WHAT HAPPENED LAST NIGHT?????’. You are wishing that you drank more water when you got home although the burger seemed to help at the time. No replies. Is anyone alive? Can anyone help me solve the mystery of last nights antics? Please. In a state you rush out of bed to fall back down: you’re still drunk, let’s take it slow. You take a glance at yourself in the mirror and gasp at the panda eyed mess with… Is that a ketchup stain on your face? Oh dear you are not looking or feeling good.
Replies start to appear and it’s not good. ‘Hahahaha you were so funny OMG’ and ‘Not feeling good, bet you aren’t either after last night!!’. Still no answers, just more shame.
Because of all this, you have decided that the best thing to do is just hide in bed all day watching movies and avoiding work. Obviously you’ll post a photo on Instagram later telling the world ‘what a great night out you had’ even though you don’t remember it. Least you look pretty in the photo though.
Love Poppy x